MY PUBLIC PRIVATE DIARY #1

July 3rd - 19th 2024

WEDNESDAY JULY 3rd 2024 - 12:17pm - HOME

I need a job. I hate Indeed. I hate tailoring my resume for every single job that I don’t want, that I know I’ll quit after two weeks. I used to be so savvy with finding odd jobs. Odd jobs are ideal… the transience, the lack of authority, their noncommittal nature … and the odder the better. I really should ditch Indeed and start scouring Craigslist instead. I used to have a job grocery shopping and chopping vegetables for a vegan bodybuilding lawyer. The best odd job I had was when I gave social counselling lessons to an autistic midget I met on the internet.

I’ll never forget - he reached out to me from what I would later learn was a burner account and said, “it seems like you have a lot of friends… I do not… would you be able to help give me some advice on how to boost my social and dating life?” 

And the entrepreneurial shameless 23 year old that I was responded: “babe, I don’t just have advice… I have a curriculum. And for $50 an hour you can gain access to my vast artillery of social expertise” or - I thought - he could kill me. Dealer’s choice! (I didn’t really think about consequences much back then.)

We met up a few times, and he inevitably would prove unfixable (by an unqualified psychological “professional”, can you believe it?) and though I tried to teach him about boundaries, the way I ended up letting him “practice hugging” on me proved that I wasn’t a very good teacher. I think I made a few hundred bucks, though, for basically just going out for lunch once in a while with an incel. Now that I think about it, that might have been sex work.